Our life is filled with choices every minute, hour, day, week, and month there are new choices to make. How do we know if we are making the right decision? Or is there a right decision to be made? Each choice we make has consequences good or bad.
How do you make your decisions? Is it based on facts? Or do you follow your gut feeling?
Recently, a good friend and I were talking about her decision to possibly have a second child. After she had her first child, she thought she was done having children, but as the years go by and seeing her friends have children, she is considering having another child. She knows having a second child will cost more money, cause sleepless nights, and she will have to go through pregnancy and labor again. However, after spending time at her parents’ house in her hometown where her sister and brother live, cherishing the time with her siblings she is considering having another child. She realized by only having one child, her daughter would never experience the sibling relationship she enjoys so much.
If she chooses not to have another child, she could have more money for her family to do things together, avoid any medical issues that may arise from pregnancy, or focus on her career. She will also leave her daughter as an only child and not provide her with the opportunity to experience sibling relationships. Her daughter may also carry the sole burden of helping her parents as they age.
If my friend chooses to get pregnant and have another child, she will have to tighten the budget, raise a new born in a city where she doesn’t have immediate family, and take time off from work and deal with being pregnant. She will also be adding another element to their family, giving her daughter a chance to be a big sister, expanding their family, and bring more love to their home.I am sure many of you reading this have your own opinions about what she should do, but my friend is the only one who can make this choice and it will affect her life the most
Another friend of mine recently retired and is spending more time at home than she’s used to. She is an extrovert and enjoys being around people and helping others but she doesn’t want to go back to the career she had prior to retirement. She loves spending time with her family but family time alone doesn’t satisfy all of needs she has. What does she do? Volunteer and give her time away for free? Look for part-time work? Or try to find a new full-time job at retirement age?
Sometimes having too many options is worse than having no options at all. How many of you have eaten at the Cheese Cake Factory? Each time I go there, I am overwhelmed by the book of food options (menu) they offer their patrons. Their food is great but with so many options, how do you choose?
I find that many people struggle when they are considering leaving a job or taking a new one. One of my clients has been offered a great job at a well-known social media company and is going to have her second child in the next few months. She would also like to go back to school to obtain her master’s degree. There are several factors to consider. Does she take the job and plan to complete her master’s in a few years when she has two young toddlers? Or does she turn down the amazing job offer and go back to school full-time? Only she can make that decision but each decision has both positive and negative consequences. How does she know which path to choose?
It is my belief that if you clear your head and follow your gut, you will know the path that is in your highest good. It is also my belief that if you choose a different path, at some point, you will be guided back towards the original path. You might have a few more bruises and life lessons but somehow the universe reminds us where we are supposed to be.
When I was in graduate school, I met a man in Kentucky, who was originally from San Diego. We discussed marriage and our future which would land us in San Diego. We broke up so I did not move to San Diego that year. Soon after our break-up, a close friend of mine said she and her husband were moving to San Francisco and they invited me to move along with them. I just finished graduate school and could make a fresh new start there. However, I was too scared to leave the Midwest at the time so I turned down the offer. Three years later, I felt it was time to leave the Midwest and I met a man in Chicago that was from San Diego. This opened my eyes to California again, now for the third time in the past four years. That summer, I packed my things and moved to San Diego. The minute I arrived, it felt like home. California kept reappearing in my life, and I couldn’t ignore it. If I did, I knew my life would have gone down a direction I didn’t want to go.
Do know that following your gut or path in your highest good, doesn’t mean your life will be without struggles. Each path we choose has struggles, the struggles will just be different. When making a choice, you have to decide which choice and struggles, do you think are best for you, in your highest good, and you can handle.
If you need help making some life choices, feel free to reach out to Happiness Now.